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In a job appliance for Regency Furniture acquaint online, chargeless abettor bouncer Delonte West arrested the “full-time” box and answered “yes” to the question, “Have you anytime been bedevilled of a crime?”

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To the followup — “If yes, call in full” — West wrote, “Misunderstanding.”

In September 2009 while West was arena for the Cleveland Cavaliers, Prince George (Md.) County badge chock-full him about 10 p.m. a his home afterwards he cut off a badge cruiser in his three-wheeled 2009 Can-Am Spyder motorcycle. West told the cops he was accustomed a gun in his waist band. They additionally activate a .357 beggared to his leg and a shotgun central a guitar case slung beyond his back.

Apparently, the confounding was that West apprehension it was OK to biking about as Mad Max.

(He pleaded accusable in July 2010 to cartage and weapons charges.)

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Early in the NBA lockout that threatens to annihilate the 2011-2012 season, West tweeted that he was attractive for assignment at Home Depot. He afterwards told TrueHoop he activated at Sam’s Club, saying, “I absolutely ability accept assignment with Sam’s (Club), BJ’s, affairs knives.”

I assumption because they don’t backpack guns.

West avalanche into the class of NBA players who accept appear off about as bored, absent and alone hardly out of blow these accomplished months as owners and players altercate capacity of a new aggregate acceding agreement. This is a big advance over the aftermost NBA lockout in 1998-99, aback alliance NBA players came off as acquisitive and egoistic and from here-to-Mars out of touch. And the advance is not by accident.

The NBA Players Association issued a 56-page lockout handbook to its constituency in apprehension of a continued activity stalemate this time around. According to the New York Times, it covered budgeting, amateur casework and media. And it agitated a warning: “Please be acute about interviews or added media displays of a comfortable lifestyle.”

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NBA players — pro athletes in every sport, absolutely — accept agitation acceptable the accessible relations action aback there’s a lockout or strike. For one, bodies anticipate they’re grossly overpaid to activate with. For another, the owners are abundant abate in number. The abettor of the action usually institutes a gag order.

Basically, buying knows that players can do and say the craziest things accustomed abundant time. Some of those things are apprenticed to backfire aback the accessible is already pre-disposed to adulatory a pox on both houses of the clashing sides.

Compared to the aftermost NBA lockout and added assignment stoppages in pro sports, though, NBA players accept for the best allotment abhorred some of the added arrant pratfalls of the past:

In an October 1998 interview, bouncer Kenny Anderson accustomed he spent $75,000 a year on allowance and aliment of his eight cars. Said Anderson, “I was cerebration of affairs one of my cars. I don’t charge them all. You apperceive aloof get rid of the Mercedes.”

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Oh the horrors of accepting alone one car for anniversary day of the week.*The aforementioned year, Patrick Ewing, admiral of the NBA Players Association, said, “As pro athletes we accomplish a lot of money but we absorb a lot of money, too.”*When players aggregate to altercate the activity situation, they chose Las Vegas. Aback they captivated a alms basketball game, they angled bottomward and best Atlantic City as the site. A allotment of the gain from that d were appointed for “needy” players but the accessible backfire was so abundant all gain went to charities.*When the lockout ended, Shawn Kemp became the face of indulgence. Which fabricated faculty aback he developed two added chins during the 204-day stalemate. He appear to the Cleveland Cavaliers as a Macy’s array float, belief able-bodied over 300 pounds.

Aback arch drillmaster Mike Fratelo asked him how he could’ve let himself so, Kemp said, “Coach, I didn’t anticipate we were advancing back.”*Guard Tim Hardaway, out of blow with acclamation assuming accessible aloofness against the NBA at the time, said, “People are craving to see pro basketball.”

Aloof not Shawn Kemp.*The accent set by NBA players during the 1998-99 lockout alleged to apperception active aback John Riggins during the 1982 NFL strike.

Somebody came up with the ablaze abstraction of staging exhibition amateur in Los Angeles and Washington, D.C. that year. Admitting a abridgement of insurance, Riggins played.

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Said Riggins, “I’ll do aloof about annihilation for money.”

This time around, NBA players for the best allotment haven’t aggravated the situation. “For the best part” agency about anybody except Kenyon Martin whose Twitter annual agitated a bulletin to detractors:

“All Haters should t abounding absolute Aids and die. Do the apple a favor! and rid us of you all!”

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Martin’s Twitter annual was deactivated the aing day and he denied sending out the tweet. He is arena in China.

At the actual least, no one has pulled a Rashard Mendenhall, the Pittsburgh Steelers active aback who tweeted afterwards the afterlife of Osama bin Laden that we’d alone heard “one side” of a terrorist’s legacy. And said of 9-11, “We’ll never apperceive what absolutely happened. I aloof accept a adamantine time assertive a even could booty a building bottomward annihilation style.”

When antic appurtenances behemothic Champion alone him as a client, Mendenhall sued for aperture of contract.

So no NBA amateur has won the Mendenhall Trophy this time admitting a alarming befalling to allege of account of the backward Moammar Gaddafi.

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This time around, best players accept abounding the abandoned rather harmlessly.

New Orleans point bouncer Chris Paul appeared on Ancestors Feud with his ancestor and added ancestors members.*Kris Humphries affiliated a Kardashian.*Kris Humphries was served annulment affidavit by a Kardashian 72 canicule later.*Kevin Love took up bank volleyball.*Ron Artest afflicted his name to Metta Apple Peace and went on Dancing With The Stars.*Dwight Howard and Gilbert Arenas acquaint pictures of themselves “planking.”*Kevin Durant accustomed a Twitter fan’s appeal to comedy banderole football at Oklahoma State.*LeBron James put on the pads and accomplished with his old aerial academy football team.*Blake Griffin interned with the internet amusement armpit Funny or Die.*Spencer Hawes, a Seattle native, got the Space Needle baldheaded into the aback of his head.*Amar’e Stoudemire said players ability accept to accede starting their own league.

According to the latest reports, the 2011-12 division ability be canceled. Which will leave players affluence of time to add to this list.

Bud Shaw is a columnist for the Cleveland Plain Dealer who has additionally accounting for the Philadelphia Daily News, San Diego Union-Tribune, Atlanta Journal-Constitution and The National. You can apprehend his Plain Dealer columns at Cleveland.com, and apprehend all his mental_floss accessories here.

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